Sometimes the male mind seems just slightly more accessible than the edge of the solar system. Women of the world, wonder no more: We've got answers to your questions about male behavior.
Guys' 10 Secret Dating Rules
For as long as there have been men and women, there have been dating and dating rituals. Being the sly hunters we are, men have built up a reservoir of knowledge and cunning over the millennia on how to successfully woo the ladies over the first few weeks of a courtship.
There are many fish in the sea, and there are many baiting procedures you can use to reel them in. And though many women may be aware of some of our strategies, they surely don't know of all of them. Let's keep it that way, gentlemen. Keep these timeless secret dating tips under your hat and enjoy the learning process.Wait three days before calling back
The idea behind this dating rule of thumb is to make sure that your new squeeze doesn't think you're desperate to see her. And it's become a golden rule because it often works. Many women know the dating game, and want to see if their new man can play it. Prove that you can by keeping it cool, and resisting the urge to follow up on a meeting too promptly. Just make sure not to wait longer than a few days to call back, or she may cool off entirely.Take her where everyone knows your name
Another way to impress your new woman early in the game is to go somewhere where you already have a great reputation. By taking her to one of your usual haunts, you'll get to showcase your smooth self in action among your vast circle of acquaintances. Whether it's a simple greeting from a DJ at the club or a restaurant manager who hooks you up with the best table, a display of social clout will definitely make an impact on your date. It's a surefire way to let her know that she's caught herself a real man.
Resist sleeping with her early on
Aside from the fact that withholding yourself will keep her wanting you more, adhering to this rule also shows her that you're a man who isn't ruled by his loins. Don't hold back entirely, though; kiss her passionately as if you were going to have sex, then pull away. Doing so will heighten the sexual tension and will be a huge turn-on for her. And when you finally do decide to do the deed, your patience and self-control will end up paying huge dividends in the bedroom.Limit your spending
One of the best ways to know if she's a keeper is to find out how much money she expects you to spend on her. On early dates, take her to places where you don't have to spend much, such as a coffee shop, lounge or boardwalk. This will give you a chance to figure out whether she's all about you... or your wallet. Mind you, don't cheap out completely, or she'll just think you're a bum.
Screen her first few calls
While the 10th rule prevents you from appearing too needy, this one allows you to gauge whether she's desperate. You want to make sure that you're not getting involved with someone with stalker tendencies. Return her calls one or two days later, so that you keep control of the situation ‑- but no later than this, or you risk turning her off completely and losing your honey to another bee.
Don't offer her gifts early on
Very rarely are you going to recognize a woman as the love of your life within the first few months of dating her. At this point you're still getting to know her, and she most likely hasn't revealed any of those true quirks or characteristics that could put a quick end to your dating. So don't get all goofy and start showering her with expensive gifts.Be mysterious... but not weird
Remember not to volunteer any information about past relationships, your family or your job right away. Your woman will keep you guessing about her, so you need to do the same in return. Maintaining some intrigue keeps the spice in dating. Let her tease information out of you slowly. Make her think that she's "winning" this game, even as you control the flow of information. Just make sure you don't get too creepy about it, or you could end up scaring her off.
Don't flatter her too much
While it's true that you will have to do some flattering in your initial flirtations, keep it toned down. The worst thing you can do is lay on the compliments too thick at the beginning. Rather than inflating her head, see if she can enjoy your company and conversation without an accompanying ego massage.Don't meet her friends ‑- yet
Finding the time to date a new girl is always a challenge, so don't make things more difficult for yourself by agreeing to meet her friends, as well. Besides exposing yourself to a modern-day inquisition, you risk also giving her the impression that she can invite one or more of her friends to come out with the two of you. Even worse, she may want to double-date with her friends and their boyfriends. It's just a bad situation, and you don't want anything to do with it. So keep her friends out of the picture until you feel confident that the relationship is actually heading somewhere.
It's a two-way street, and it's always best to keep your new woman away from your good buddies at the start, too. She may not be prepared for their sense of humor, or they may reveal things about you that you'd rather keep her in the dark about. And make no mistake, she will try and get the scoop on you from your friends if she meets them. Don't let it happen.Dating Rules to Memorize
Now that you know all the secret dating rules, get out there and catch some women using your newfound knowledge. Just remember to keep this stuff between the brothers. (iVillage editor's note: Whoops! Sorry, boys.)